A TikTok video is going viral set in the lonely grass plains with a teenage boy and some cans of soda in the background; the view monitor increases every time.

 

Random teenager (excitedly): Hey guys! I just bought this new NUG; I’ve never owned one or shot one before, but according to the box, it doesn’t matter because it should let you aim at whatever with the sharpshooting skills of Yusuf Dikeç. You know the Olympics 2024 Turkish legend? Let’s see!

 

The teenage boy closes his eyes. There is no recoil, and the targets are directly aimed at each time.

 

Random teenager: Oh crap! This really works!

 

The video ends; multiple other videos pop up with men buying this NUG. The TikTok feed is now oversaturated with just mostly the brand of new sNUG and has made it into mainstream news. Two reporters from FOX News are covering this topic.

 

Male reporter: Don’t know what to buy your husband or sons this Christmas? Well, look no further; because just like Labubus have had their moment, now there’s a new product making its rounds, pun intended, on the Christmas wish list.

 

Female reporter: Well, actually Dave, some women want this new product, too. The initial viral video shows a young teen boy, who never had shot a NUG before using this new, white NUG model, and boy can you tell he’s never used one.

 

Male reporter: It would have recoiled right on his face and lacerated it!

 

Female reporter (fake laughs): That’s right, Dave! And, the fact that he closed his eyes, but he perfectly hit his targets! (Pantomimes mind blown with sound effect) It makes me want to buy one.

 

Male reporter: Well, we all know women need more help in aiming.

 

Female reporter (fake laughs): Dave, you old bastard.

 

The sales soar for this new NUG and its company’s other similar products. The feed goes to reporters having an opportunity to finally ask Trump their questions.

 

MSNBC Reporter: Mr. President, Harvey from MSNBC, have you heard of the new sNUG?

 

Trump (ignorantly): Oh, yes of course! You know. I helped, and in so many ways, others say, not myself, but you know others, that this is greatly widely important, and I did help.

 

CNN Reporter: The viral new weapon, sir. It is said to be an AI gun, and it has recently won the market, but it has no connections to the NRA.

 

Trump (angrily): Right, well, yes, I do know, and in many ways, did just answer that. But, you know, you’re not very nice, some and not just me, say you are nasty, but really?

 

CNN Reporter: Yes, sir. Its stock is also doing extremely well in the market, despite the recession.

 

Trump (hurriedly): Okay, well, I have to go to Antarctica to get treats, and in many ways, they will also help us, and by us, I mean the billionaires, not you.

 

Many bipartisan politicians start to buy stock from iGUN. In the United States, nationwide, police departments and the military buy solely iGUN products. iGUN products are now the sole monopoly for the NUG market. The scene cuts to breaking news from a Telemundo/NBC report.

 

Telemundo Reporter #1: This is just in. A young man was stopped by police after an officer claimed that his plates were expired. The officer drew her weapon, claims to have mistaken it for her taser, and aimed at the young 19-year old college student driver.

 

Telemundo Reporter #2: How heartbreaking for the family. Our condolences to them.

 

Telemundo Reporter #1 (shaking his head): That’s the thing, Karina. The gun was made by iGUN and luckily, it never shot!

 

The bodycam footage rolls in the breaking news segment; the officer draws her weapon after screaming at the young man to open the driver’s door. She pulls the trigger; a red scanning light is seen, and an AI voice is heard.

 

AI: Scan indicates no threat. Target is not a target. No shots will be done.

 

The police officer grunts, and she continues to pull the trigger two more times.

 

AI (cont’d): No threat visible. Further attempts are discouraged and will warrant a safety trigger and report.

 

Officer: What the hell?

 

She pulls the trigger once more; at which point the iGUN model goes off and a shot is heard. The bodycam footage shows the officer fall to the ground.

 

Officer: You shot me in the foot?

 

AI: Crisis averted. Report and footage assessment dispatched. Ambulance dispatch on route.

 

The scene returns to the Telemundo reporters.

 

Telemundo Reporter #2: Wait, so she tried to shoot the young man multiple times, but luckily the NUG was more intelligent and prevented a senseless tragedy?

 

Telemundo Reporter #1: Yes, and apparently an investigation by the police and a lawsuit are on their way because this officer had previous complaints, but she always had “fall back excuses.”

 

An AP breaking news story is shown. The headline reads “We would have had another school mass shooting in Oklahoma, but luckily the weapons recovered were iGUN produced, so no fatalities occurred only a manageable injury to the perpetrator.” An NRA meeting is occurring.

 

NRA Representative: What the fuck is going on?

 

NRA Lobbyist: Sir, I don’t –

 

NRA Rep.: No, I fucking know that you know nothing. Bill Gates, is this your shit?

 

Bill Gates: No, it’s not me.

 

NRA Rep.: Okay, then it’s you, from fucking Apple, right? I mean it’s literally like your brand to have “i” in front of it.

 

Tim Cook (angrily): It’s not us, either! We all lobby for you and give you funds. Plus, we agree with your plan of laissez faire population control management. Hell, why do you think we even help the administration with the anti-vaccine crap and fund RFK Jr.’s bullshit, huh? Cause we like him or think he’s intelligent, don’t bullshit me!

 

NRA Rep.: Then who the fuck is doing this? (to the NRA Lobbyist) You better make the media find out. I want the maker’s head!

 

A witch hunt by the government and media is done to search for the owners of iGUN Corporation. The maker releases a video on multiple social media platforms.

 

iGUN creator (with voice distortion): You’ll keep searching and looking endlessly for me, but I did what so many parents and people have yearned for, safety. Safety not just for us, but especially for our children and future generations. You wanted AI to flourish despite the constant fear of taking jobs away from every hardworking person, fine. Just know, that I used my BME degree and the knowledge of my friends to create a cohort, and we have now won and prevented any senseless violence. Welcome to the 21st Century, motherfuckers.

 

The scene fades from the video to two adults spending a snowy day in their backyard with their children. The matriarch and patriarch look at their children happily.

 

Spouse #1: Canada really is beautiful, isn’t it?

 

Spouse #2: I’m so sorry that we had to leave. It’s just – I was afraid that we’d be unsafe because of the NRA and government.

 

Spouse #1 (shakes his head): You made the United States safer, it’s not your fault that our product outwitted their greed.

 

Spouse #2 (smiling): Luckily, we both get to use our degrees here in Canada, and sometimes we can still collab on studies thanks to your comp. sci. degree and its advancements for biomedical engineering.

 

Spouse #1: But, like you said, more importantly, we’ve given families the opportunity to have their children grow up, rather than just sending them “our thoughts and prayers.”

 

The children approach their parents and invite them to play. The parents chuckle and join their children on this happy snowy day.

 

BLACKOUT.