INT. BBC HEADQUARTERS BREAKING NEWS MAIN OFFICE. – DAY/MORNING.

 

BBC Reporter #1: Good morning, and thank for joining us. Today, we have an impromptu interview.

 

BBC Reporter #2: You’re right, Marianne. We’re truly invested in this interview now. Let’s go to the live feed.

 

The screen shows Medusa with a large red bow covering her eyes. The two BBC reporters look unfazed and ready to ask her questions.

 

Medusa (singing): “And I’m too perfect ‘til I open my big mouth/ I want to be me, is that not allowed?/ And I’m too clever, and then I’m too fucking dumb -”

 

Marianne (clears her throat): Miss Medusa, please, we’re live on air.

 

Medusa (smiles): Oh, I know! By the way, Lola Young is a great artist; y’all should be proud!

 

Medusa’s snakes cutely find their angles for the camera.

 

Reporter #2 (clears his throat): Right, so Miss Medusa, please tell us what you’ve seen and how you’ve decided to move forward.

 

Medusa: Well, I mostly tried to lay low, you know? I’ve studied and accomplished so much, like my medical and anthropology degrees. I’ve also travelled and lived among so many people.

 

Marianne: Right, but can we get back to the main topic?

 

One of Medusa’s snakes hisses gently; Medusa reassures it.

 

Medusa: Okay, okay. Main point is, in both World Wars, we saw it happen almost back to back. It was unlike anything Plato or Socrates could have ever foreseen.

 

Reporter #2 (interrupts): So, now you know how to cure it?

 

Medusa (clears her throat): Have you ever noticed that in terms of both World Wars, there were evil men who were never loved that became dictators? Talk about putting the dick in –

 

Marianne (imploring): Madame, please!!

 

Medusa: Listen, sweetie, where I learned English, madame means married, and I’m still a single pringle. So please, don’t be rude.

 

Reporter #2 (cautiously): She didn’t mean any offense, miss!

 

Aphrodite joins Medusa in the call; the camera feed enters an ethereal filter.

 

Aphrodite (calmly and sweetly smiling): Awww! Don’t worry, she isn’t going to use her powers! We’re just here to promote how to defeat a dick-tater tot and our new talk show!

 

Medusa (calmly): Please, I was just politely clarifying misinformation.

 

Marianne: Sorry, James is just traumatized after they fired our BBC execs after Trump threatened them.

 

James nods sadly; Aphrodite gives him a dazzling smile, and he blushes.

 

Medusa: Good God! You don’t mean to compare us to that cretin?

 

Aphrodite: You mean the smallus dickus?

 

Medusa: Don’t you mean minus dickus?

 

Aphrodite (stifling her laughter): And that’s why he sucked –

 

James (blushing to another level): Ladies, please –

 

Marianne stops him.

 

Marianne: No, let them bake.

 

Medusa: You mean cook? Oh, but yes, you all should keep fighting for your freedom of speech.

 

Aphrodite (nodding): It’s a slippery fascist slope; first of all, the fact that some of your government leaders wanted to idolize Charlie Kirk, yikes!

 

Medusa: Especially because it was a planned job, allegedly. Secondly, there’s been more racist rhetoric emerging; well, Brexit first showed that, and once again, you start to slip as the U.S.

 

Aphrodite: Near to lastly, it took your government a while to accept that the King’s brother was a sick freak. Luckily, the people stood up, and his birth privileges were finally taken away.

 

Medusa: But, you all haven’t stood up to Trump and his threats, like the BBC firings and the Grok/Elon Musk crimes.

 

Marianne: But, we’ve finally mobilized support for Greenland!!

 

Aphrodite: Yes, but once more Europe allowed a dick-tater tot to attack Venezuela, Iran, Iraq, Syria, Somalia, Yemen, and Nigeria, but now that you see his plan nearing your area suddenly some of you can protect others.

 

Marianne (horrified): So you defend Trump’s actions?!?!??

 

Aphrodite and Medusa face each other and sigh.

 

Medusa (calmly): No, don’t you get it?

 

James: That we’re flawed, and everything is going to shit?

 

Aphrodite (gently smiles): When a body is infected by a pathogen, some cells become infected and try to spread the disease.

 

Medusa: The pathogen is the racists. The body is the country, and the cells are the people, day-to-day residents.

 

Aphrodite (calmly): Some will be affected, but when the body sees the pathogenic infection, it doesn’t give up and surrender to the disease or plague.

 

Medusa: Instead, the body’s own immune system rises; it sees and learns the pathogen’s methods and counteracts it.

 

Marianne: So, how does it defeat them?

 

Aphrodite (smiles): By blocking the poison that the pathogen tries to propagate.

 

Medusa: We don’t mean restricting freedom of speech, but rather to counteract the racist and misogynistic rhetoric with the Truth –

 

James (pensively): How?

 

Aphrodite: With knowledge, giving platform to intelligent professionals and studies that show how diversity, equity, and inclusion raise the economy, workplaces, and education of countries.

 

Medusa: Each person is like a cell; they have the agency to combat the infection –

 

Aphrodite: Some might catch the infection, but that just means they need more resources to heal and recognize that the pathogen is insidious and harmful to themselves and others.

 

James: That’s all nice and good, but how can we fight off Trump and his threats?

 

Aphrodite and Medusa smile gently, and both BBC reporters find themselves also smiling for the first time in this interview.

 

Aphrodite: Simple! Use his own threats onto him!

 

Medusa: Exactly, he threatens with tariffs, like President Macron says, back them up with the trade “bazooka.” Attack the pockets that back him: Apple, Elon Musk, the tech freaks, and other creepy billionaires.

 

Aphrodite: Your company is at an advantage in that unlike the stupid SkyNews, BBC is owned by your government. Keep your heads up and move forward united.

 

Medusa: Would it also hurt y’all to include Latin America, Africa, the Middle East, and Asia in assisting and helping them, without strings attached?

 

The two reporters look about sheepishly.

 

James: But Trump has friends in financially high places and –

 

Medusa and Aphrodite burst out laughing; they both wipe a tear away.

 

Aphrodite (still laughing): Oh, that’s a good one, James!

 

James (blushing): I promise I wasn’t trying to –

 

Medusa (laughing with Aphrodite and her snakes): Trump doesn’t have any friends!

 

BLACKOUT.

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